How many life changes are too many? This sounds like a philosophical question. But it’s not. I have a concrete, numerical answer for you. Seven. Seven life changes are too many.
I’ve been feeling overwhelmed lately. My partner and I are in our early to mid 20’s so we’re going through a lot of common transitional phases in our life. However, we’re also going through the transitional phases with a baby- adding a lot more stress into the mix! Babies/children love stability, and we have so many unknowns in our life that stability seems like such an unrealistic and unattainable goal at this point in time.
Here are the seven life changes I am simultaneously going through. I hope by getting all these thoughts out of my mind and into the universe, my head will feel a little clearer.
1. New baby! This is a big one, of course. There is no bigger life adjustment than adding a child into the mix. Every decision we make from here on out, impacts our child. Life isn’t about me anymore. It’s not even about “us.” It’s about him- baby E.
2. Starting school. I’ll be leaving the workforce (and leaving mat-leave!) behind and heading back to hitting the books. Except graduate school I’ve heard is a lot more work than undergrad.
3. Spouse changing careers. My spouse has been bustin’ his butt trying to get into a new career. He’s be applying in multiple different cities and we’re still unsure of where his job hunt will take us.
4. Moving. Related to point #3, we will eventually be moving. The exact city is TBD adding to the confusion. Will we continue to rent? Will we officially become grown ups and get a mortgage? Where will our new city be!?
5. Physical changes. My body has been through a lot. The most obvious being that I gained 60lbs, had a major operation (c-section) and lost 50lbs. Who’s body is this, and where did mine go? My latest struggle has been transitioning baby E to solids. I was exclusively breastfeeding up until 6 months, and as I introduce more foods into his diet, my hormones are allover the map (re: lots of irrational crying).
6. Wedding/marriage. My partner and I are making the leap from common-law to married. I’m not sure exactly how this will change our relationship- I’m thinking very little- but we’ve decided to celebrate with a wedding. Given our hectic lives, we’ve decided this one may wait until 2+ years from now… Although eloping is still on the table and very enticing.
7. Social life. Or rather lack thereof. 99.9% of the plans my friends make are not breastfeeding/cosleeping mom friendly (I need to be home by 9pm). I’m patiently waiting for play dates and birthday parties.
And as a poor student, money woes are creeping around on top of everything else.
Needless to say, I’m a little stressed out. But life doesn’t give us what we can’t handle, so we’re taking all of these massive changes one day at a time.
Hope you’re all taking care of yourselves,